GizaL Just Another Blog

2009-10-21T15:50:00.002+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Teacher: What is ABCDE?
Boy: Dunno.

The boy asked his mother at home, who is busy trying to follow instructions from the cook book.
Boy: Mom, what is ABCDE?
Mother: **angry** Shut up or I'll stuff your mouth with curry chicken!
The boy remembered and asked his father who was busy singing a song
Boy: Dad, what is ABCDE?
Father: **busy singing** In the toilet, in the toilet!
He remembered and asked the karanguni man who collects newspapers
Boy: Karanguni, what is ABCDE?
Karanguni: I am George Washington. You are karanguni. Puput!
He remembered and asked the TV, who is advertising a restaurant.
Boy: TV, what is ABCDE?
TV: **advertising** 62-35-35-35
He remembered and asked his brother who was listening to his MP3 player.
Boy: Bro, what is ABCDE?
Brother: **singing along** Come on baby, one more time!

The next day, the teacher asked the boy again.
Teacher: What is ABCDE?
Boy: Shut up or I'll stuff your mouth with curry chicken!
Teacher: **gasp** Where are your manners?
Boy: In the toilet, in the toilet!

The boy was sent to the principal's office for a lecture.

Principal: What is your name?
Boy: I am George Washington. You are karanguni. Puput!
Principal: What is you father's handphone number?
Boy: 62-35-35-35

The principal was furious and got ready to cane the boy.
Principal: Any last words?
Boy: Come on baby, one more time!

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These are the things i done during the weekend.
On Friday, actually want to watch movie on my com but Zhi Xiong smsed and asked me out for mahjong and so went to Justin House with zhi xiong, nathan, Cheng Bo and Wu Wen. Played for quite long and learned a lot and we played from 3pm to abt 12pm.
Then On Sat, my uncle called to say my aunt had passed away in the hospital. She had been hospitalised for quite a few times. So we went to her funeral and stayed there till abt 11pm.
On Sunday. Went there again and did the same thing and stayed till 11pm too.
On Monday, we went for cremation of the body and till abt 3pm. Then i went back home and bathed and went to watch movie with Darren, edwin, Belsher and Jia Chun, the movie is Imagine That. Quite funny dun really get some parts. After that, actually want go home liao but they say wan go Sing K, So went and wasted 23 dollars cos i at there sleeping and eat only. Till abt 10pm, Belsher father came ad he drove us home reached home abt 11pm.
On Tues, went to give out flyer and my cousins came, Joseph and James, only 9 and 10years old. They stayed till only abt 9pm then went home.
Then today, i stayed at home and body aches all over and i used com to watch NBA and download movies...

2009-10-10T17:08:00.002+08:00

Joke of the Day:
A witch went into a sweet shop to buy some sweets. the man behind the counter said "Gosh you are really ugly aren't you? i've never seen anyone as offensively hideous as you." "young man" she replied, "i didn't come in here to be insulted." "Really," He said " Where do you usually go?"

Some may not understand...
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Yesterday went to collect my prize which i won form a magazine. Got a X-Men Origins: Wolverine DVD and some other things including a Notebook and my favourite, a 512mb USB. Then got home and used com and watch the movie, Street Fighter: Legend of Chun Li, better than i expected. Rate it 8/10.

2009-10-03T22:54:00.002+08:00

Joke of the day:
A big city London lawyer went duck hunting in rural Scotland. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked the lawyer what he was doing.

The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and your not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer replied. "I'm one of the best trial lawyers in the UK, and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything that you own.

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Scotland. We settle small disagreements like this, with the Scottish Three Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What is the Scottish Three Kick Rule?"

The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly gets down from the tractor and walked up to the city fella. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin, which dropped him to his knees.

His second kick nearly ripped the nose off his face.

The lawyer was flat on his belly, when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly causing him to give up, but didn't.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old tosser, now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said,

"Naw, I give up, You can keep the duck!"

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Today went to give out flyers those door to door de. With zhi xiong, then we two each get thousand pieces and each give out 7 blks. We done in 4 hrs actually can faster de but gt some prob in the middle so delay a bit. Then we take train home he stop at hougang and then i went on to meet jia chun and jia min and damien. They doing homework and saw jia le while exiting the mrt. He say waiting for benetton and i ate at mac for dinner. Then they study til 6.30 and went up to kopitiam for dinner, after that, damien went home and left we 3. We went to library to study and when the library closes we went to Arcade to play. Keep losing all the games to them....After that minny mother come and we went home.

2009-09-26T23:25:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday Edwin!

Joke of the day:
Ah Lum was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 & 10.
Not only did he do it from 1 to 10, he also did it from 10 back to 1 as well. This is his story.

1 day I went 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep but the couple saw me so I panicked and 4 down. The man rushed out and wanted to 5 with me. I ran until I fell 6 and threw up. So I went into 7eleven and grabbed some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and tried to stab him. 10 god he ran away.

So I put the 9 back and paid for the 8 and then I left 7eleven. Next day, I called my boss and said that I was 6. He said, "5, tomorrow also no neeed to come back 4 work." He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand. I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.
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Firstly, happy birthday Edwin. Today have Srp on Physics and SS, after that went to hougang mall eat lunch with Nathand, jun ming, Zhi xiong. Then we saw Wu wen and Sherman and Hwee Sian and Alyssa then see justin and his frens. Actually wan to go home straight after, but nathan they all wan play soccer so i follow them then when walk out of Hougang mall saw Edwin and Darren and Yeo Jiunn. They also follow us and we went Bershinda house downstairs and play soccer and badminton. Play until abt5 then went home . Got home and bath then use PS3.

2009-09-18T21:13:00.002+08:00

Joke of the day:
Three men were waiting at Heaven's Gate. St. Peter says, "Okay, guys, pretty much anything goes up here, but whatever you do, never lie, or you will spend the rest of eternity with the ugliest women in the universe."
So they all agree and are admitted in. The first guy makes it a week before he lies about how rich he was on Earth. Bam! Right at his side appears the ugliest woman he had ever seen.
The second guy makes it another couple weeks before he lies about how smart he is. Bam! At his side appears the second ugliest woman in the universe.So the first two guys are walking around with their monsters of women when they see their third friend walking with the hottest woman ever conceived by man. The first two guys say in unison, "How did you end with that babe when we get stuck with these nasty women?"
He nudges the babe and says, "Tell them."
She says to the first two guys, "I lied."

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Today is one of my not happiest but funniest day of this year. Today is usual school day but gt two maths test both also quite easy. After school, eat lunch at canteen then nathan went home and then wanted to play bball but raining so samuel went. home. Then me and jun ming went to join kendra and felicia to chit chat then we started to talk abt kendra and chee kang relationship and jun ming and I crack so many jokes lo i laugh until cant take it lo. But kendra like a bit angry la. Then Zhi xiong came down and joined us, he teach us some games then actually wanted to go home but raining so chit chat wif them. Then kendra and felicia went home and we three went play bball wif Zhi Xiong CO junior, they quite good might ask them to consider joining basketball but i think they wont de. Then went home wif Jun Ming and wee zheng, then jun ming and we started to talk abt wee zheng and li ting. Then we crack jokes abt him and li ting then i laugh so hard lo jun ming so funny lo....

2009-08-28T22:21:00.005+08:00

Yesterday was a sad day, I have lost another good friend in my life. David went to New Zealand and not staying in Singapore anymore so we went to see him off. Some of us cried , of course including me but only tears in eye. Wee seng and Samuel cried the most.
Here are some pics :

David and the Girls from his class.

The whole group who went to see him off.

The "Dream Team " of the C Division Basketball but not anymore.

The Seniors including me.

One Last Pic

After he went off, we went to took MRT back to sengkang all way sleeping and i reach hme exactly at 12 Midnight LOL. Today is the first day after David left, Wee seng say he got no mood for basketball but in the end we still played till 7pm. Farewell, David.

2009-08-28T21:25:00.002+08:00

2009-08-22T21:51:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to knock it off and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.

"Okay, follow me," he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him. Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him. "Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked.

"Yes, yes, yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy.

"Good," said the first bat, "Because I DIDN'T!"
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Today went to see Where Got Ghost withe Damien, Nathan, Jia Chun and Jia Min.The movie is like first story very funny and not scary, then the 2nd movie quite scary and not very funny. The 3rd one is very scary and not funny at all, so ppl who like jack neo jokes can go watch. Rate it 7/10. After that went to eat dinner but only damien and jia min ate cos i eat popcorn until very full so didnt eat.

2009-08-09T19:44:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
A man was leaving a cafe when he noticed an unusual funeral. A funeral
coffin was followed by a second one. Behind the second coffin was a
solitary man walking with a black dog.

Behind him was a queue of 200 men walking in single line.

The man couldn't stand his curiosity.

He approached the man walking with the dog, "I am so sorry to disturb
you, but I've never seen a funeral like this with so many of you
walking in single line.

"Whose funeral is it?"

The man replied, "That first coffin is for my wife."

What happened to her?"

"My dog attacked and killed her."
Well, who is in the second coffin? "

"My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog
attacked and killed her also."

A thoughtful moment of silence passes between the two men.

Then the first one asks in excitement, "Can I borrow the dog?"

The man replied,

"Join the queue."!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Yesterday went to watch UP with my bro and frens, the movie quite nice give it 8/10 starting very touching. Very funny as well but i dun quite like the ending, but overall very nice. After that went to arcade and have a few games and went home. They also came our house and my sis fren came and played mahjong while i stay in the room playing com. Later maybe oging play bball.

2009-08-03T20:27:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
"Thank you so much! You have done wonder to my body and look. I was an ugly
duckling before that and >now I looked like a princess."

When the gorgeous lady left the room, the surgeon's friend asked: "Wow, who
was that? You have certainly done a good job."

The surgeon replied: "Oh, that was my mum." and they carried on with
their conversation.

A moment later, another lady walked into his room. This lady was even more
gorgeous than the first one and she too came round and kissed the surgeon:
"Thank you so much! You have really made me look 20 years younger. Those
face lift and liposuction have certainly worked wonder to my look. How can I
ever thank you!"

As the lady left the room, his friend asked again: "Bloody hell. who was
that? she sure looks like a supermodel. I am really impressed with your
surgery skills now." The surgeon replied: "Oh, that was just my wife."

They then carried on with their normal conversation. Then suddenly a third
lady walked into the room. This lady has a perfect body and the look was so
beautiful it was beyond this world. She was even more gorgeous than the
first two ladies. She stormed towards the surgeon and gave him a big slap,
yelling: "You *******. Look at what you have done to my body! You have
ruined my life!! I hope you will die in hell."

As the lady stormed away, the surgeon's friend turned round to him with a
puzzled look. The surgeon shook his head and responded: "Let's not talk
about it.....that was my father."
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Yesterday went to see Da Vinci exhibition,not bad found a lot of secrets about Mona Lisa,after seeing the exhibition went to omni theater and watch abt sea monster.After have a walk at Science Center, Nth new.Went back home at abt 6.

2009-07-13T18:35:00.004+08:00

Friday went to watch 20th century boys 2, it was better then wad i expected, i rate it 8.5/10. On Sat, went to play bball with Jia le and others. On Sunday went to CosFest with Edwin and Darren.
Here are some pics:
Edwin Team:

"Friend" if u gt watch 20th Century Boys:

Cute Baby Super Saiyan:

Super Big Gundam:

There are more and it is really big and many ppl.
Thats all.Going to watch Harry Potter on Fri with Edwin they all.

2009-07-03T21:45:00.003+08:00

Joke of the day:
A DYING man gathered his lawyer, doctor and priest at his bedside and handed each of them an envelope containing $25,000.

He made them each promise that after his death and during his funeral, they would place the three envelopes in his coffin. He told them he wanted to have enough money to enjoy the afterlife.

The man died a week later. The lawyer, doctor and priest each placed an envelope in the coffin.

Coincidentally, these three men met several months later.

Feeling guilty, the priest confessed there was only $10,000 in the envelope he placed in the coffin.

He felt the money would be better spent on a mission in South America.

Moved by the priest's honesty, the doctor also admitted he gave away some money to a medical charity. The envelope he placed in the coffin, contained only $8,000.

Seething with self-righteous outrage, the lawyer was deeply disappointed with the two men.

He said: 'I am the only one who kept his promise to our dying friend.

'The envelope I placed in the coffin contained the full amount. Indeed, it was a personal cheque for the entire $25,000.'
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Ytd went to watch Transformer with wee seng , ck and shu fen and madeline and li ting and celina . The movie is so much better than the 1st one and i rate it 8.5/10. I personally think it should be rated NC16 cos too many sexual humour and also the movie is very funny. Catch the movie if u can.I begin to like Mdm Suhana teaching i tink she is very organised. Played bball todae at Punggol CC played with many strangers.Of cos we win many matches cos with jia le skills and mine beautiful pass hard to lose..

2009-07-01T21:37:00.004+08:00

Finally back to blogging as Term 3 starts....
Joke of the Day:
It was opening night at the Orpheum and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his stuff.
As Claude took to the stage, he announced, "Unlike most stage hypnotists who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience." The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat.
I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. Its been in my family for six generations. He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch....".
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth,light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.
"Shit" said the hypnotist.
It took three weeks to clean up the theater.

It may take u a few moments to know the joke...
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School Term finally starts Changed 3 Teachers,Maths ,SS,and English.
Tmr maybe going watch Transformer, 'maybe' is becos of lacking money lot of things to buy...

2009-04-18T22:13:00.002+08:00

Happy birthday Nathan And NBA Playoff starts now! (Hope Cavs or Rockets will win,)
Joke of the Day:
A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which.

A neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse's tail and our friend was stuck again.

The neighbor suggested she notch the ear
off one horse. That worked fine until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed wire fence. Once again our friend couldn't tell them apart.

Another Joke:
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30940

The neighbor suggested she measure the horses for height. When she did, she was very pleased to find that the white horse was 2 inches taller than the black.

Today is both Nathan Bdae and the start of NBA playoff.My bro friend came yesterday and played till 3am and today they came again.Tmr maybe going play bball with bro friends.

2009-04-07T20:49:00.002+08:00

It has been a long time since i update..

Joke of the day:
A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I'd be a little bull.''

The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ''If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.''

The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ''What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?!''

The kid smiles and says, ''I would be a bus driver!''

Just watched the movie The Kite Runner the movie is quite good and Hassan is cute in the movie. Those who read the book should watch it, Going to en-mazing race this Sat.

2009-03-01T19:41:00.004+08:00

It has been a long time since i blogged...
Joke of the Day:
1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?

2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?

3. What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and gray when you throw it away?

4. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Wednesday, Friday, or Sunday?

5. This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious as to just how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it. It looks so ordinary and plain that you would think nothing was wrong with it. In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is highly unusual though. Study it and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out Try to do so without any coaching!

THE ANSWERS TO ALL FIVE THE RIDDLES ARE BELOW:

Answers:

1. The third room. Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead. That one was easy, right?

2. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry (shot; held under water; and hung).

3. Charcoal, as it is used in barbecuing.

4. Sure you can name three consecutive days, yesterday, today, and tomorrow!

5. The letter E, which is the most common letter used in the English language, does not appear even once in the paragraph.

Just watched Wall-E on my com it is a good movie i think the story is creative and it one of the best animation movie ever. Yesterday just went swimming with wee seng,chee kang, jia qi,Tian Ting and played bball with 2 more ppl jun ming and zhi sheng they didnt went swimming as they are not free...

2009-01-18T21:32:00.002+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Bravery

An Army General, a Marine General and a Navy Admiral are all sitting around discussing whose's service is better and whose troops are the bravest?
The Admiral (well into his second or third ice tea) announces to the group, " My SEALS are the BEST in the world and to prove it I'll have one do the impossiple" as he reaches for the phone.

Well the other two commanders are in an uproar and each one promply calls for his best soldier.

When all three representatives have arrived, the Admiral states "Since it was my idea, I'm first" and turning to the SEAL, he says " I want you to go down that cliff, swim across those 10 miles of shark infested waters, climb up that shear cliff and return with with 2 bird eggs... unbroken of course.".

The SEAL (being the highly trained soldier that he is) turned running towards the cliff.

After performing a triple-Lindsy into the water, the SEAL swam across the 10 miles (all the while beating off sharks with his bare hands) and reaching the far cliff, he began climbing. Near the top of the cliff, he grabs the two eggs and starts back down (all the time, fighting off mean birds). Upon reaching the sea he swims back across (once again fighting off sharks) and climbs back up the first cliff. He then runs back over to the Admiral and hands him the 2 unbroken eggs.

The Marine General says "that wasn't nothing," and turning to the Force Recon Marine he says " I want you to go down that cliff, swim across those waters, climb that other cliff,then move across the 4 miles of unmapped jungle and bring me back 2 eggs from the mountain on the other side of the jungle."

And with that the Force Recon moved-out. Traveling down the cliff, swimming across the sea, climbing the far cliff, moving through the jungle and upon reaching the 2 eggs, he heads back (all the while fighting off lions, tigers, bears, sharks, and mean birds). Finally reaching the General, the Marine hands him the eggs.

The Army General then says "Very nice gentlemen, but heres true bravery" and turning towards his BEST (an Airborne Infantryman), he says "I want you to go down that cliff, across that sea, up the far cliff, thru the 4 miles of unmapped jungle, over the mountain and bring me back 2 eggs from the forest on the other side."

The Paratrooper looks at the General, then the cliff, and again back to the General, where he says "SCREW YOU SIR!", renders a proper hand salute and walks away.

The General turn towards the other two (both with their jaws on the table) and says "Now gentlemen, that's BRAVERY."
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just now went to play basketball with my friends from 2pm to abt 7pm.Getting a new game soon and i think will delivered in 3-5 days.After that i dun tink i will use com that often so maybe not blogging so often liao.

2009-01-11T20:10:00.002+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Which is faster hot or cold?
Hot because you can catch a cold....
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This guy needs a job and decides to apply
at the zoo. As it happened, their star attraction, a gorilla,
had passed away the night before and they had carefully
preserved his hide.

They tell this guy that they'll pay him well if he would
dress up in the gorillas’ skin and pretend to be the gorilla
so people will keep coming to the zoo.

Well, the guy has his doubts, but he needs the money,
so he puts on the skin and goes out into the cage.

The people all cheer to see him. He plays up to the audience and
they just eat it up. This isn't so bad, he thinks, and he starts
really putting on a show, jumping around, beating his chest
and roaring, swinging around.

During one acrobatic attempt, though, he loses his balance
and crashes through some safety netting, landing square in
the middle of the lion cage! As he lies there stunned,
the lion roars.

He's terrified and starts screaming, "Help, Help, Help!"

The lion races over to him, places his paws on his chest and hisses,
"Shut up or we'll BOTH lose our jobs!"
------------------------------------------
Yesterday went Tian ting house stay overnight at first we played cards till abt 12 am then we played a horror game called Hotel 626 afterthat we ate maggi for supper.. And jia qi suddenly very interested in ghost..Then we watched ghost videos gt 1 is famous u can go google ghost videos and gt a video called real car accident cause by a ghost that is very real and i tink that one newspaper have. we watch some more ghost videos then we continued playing cards till abt 3am then we sleep.We woke up at 10 then went to eat breakfast and i reached home at 3 pm......

2009-01-09T18:22:00.003+08:00

Joke of the Day:

6 truths of life

6 truths of life

1)u cannot touch all your teeth with your tongue

2)all idiots will try it after reading the first truth

3)and discover that it is not true

4)u are now smilling because u are an idiot

5)u will soon tell this joke to another idiot

6)i still can see the stupid smile on your face
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Top Ten Ways to Freak Out Your Roommate

10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."

9) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

8) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "The hair, it's growing. Growing!"

I like this one the Best:
7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon...."

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."
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Just came back from sch after playing bball. Not bad with my new class and the two guy sitting behind me is so funny.......

2009-01-01T15:13:00.002+08:00

Well Happy New Year to all!!!
Joke of the First Day:
There were three people stranded on an island, a brunette, a redhead, and an blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore. So she announced, "I'm going to try to swim to shore." So she swam out five miles, and got really tired. She swam out ten miles from the island, and she was too tired to go on, so she drowned.

The second one, the redhead, said to herself, "I wonder if she made it. I guess it's better to try to get to the mainland than stay here and starve." So she attempts to swim out. The redhead had a lot more endurance than the brunette, as she swam out 10 miles before she even got tired. After 15 miles, she was too tired to go on, so she drowned.

So the blonde thought to herself, "I wonder if they made it! I think I'd better try to make it, too." So she swam out 5 miles, ten miles, fifteen miles, and finally nineteen miles from the island. The shore was just in sight, but she said, "I'm too tired to go on!" So she swam back.

Just woke up yesterday Jia qi, tian ting,Jia le and carrie they all went to watch Bedtime stories,Well the show is quite nice i rate it 8/10. After that the girls went off first then we went bowling.After that we took bus to Compass pt then take Mrt to Vivo for countdown Jia le didnt follow us though. Vivocity is very crowded we need to queued up the escalator to the 3rd floor and finally 3...2....1...Happy New Year!
Then we took MRT to CP again and took Taxi to Jalan Kayu for Roti Prata and we walked to Jia qi house there and talked till abt 3am then me and tian ting took taxi Back Home.reached home abt 3.45..

2008-12-31T10:04:00.002+08:00

Ok Today is the Day 2008 stood still.
This will be Last post of the Year..
Ok becos it is the last day so the joke is longer..
Joke of the Last Day:
A new teacher came to class. Before starting the class, she wanted to get to know them. So, she decided to use reversed psychology.

Teacher said,"Who thinks that he or she is stupid stand up."

After several minutes, one boy stands up. Teacher said, "Little Johnny, so you think you're stupid?"

He replies, "No madam, I just hate to see you standing there all by yourself."
=========================================================
An American is having breakfast in Paris one morning, when a Frenchman, chewing bubble-gum, sits down next to him.

Frenchman: "You American folk eat whole bread??"

American: "Of course."

Frenchman: "We don't. In France, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to the states."

The American listens in silence.

The Frenchman persists: "Do you eat jelly with the bread??''

American: "Of course."

Frenchman: "We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds and leftover in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam, and sell the jam to the states."

After a moment of silence, the American then ask: "Do you use condom when have sex?"

Frenchman: "Why of course we do, he says with a big smirk.

American: "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?"

Frenchman: "We throw them away of course."

American: "We don't. In America, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into bubble-gum, and sell them to France."

LESSON 1
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a
meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a magic lamp. They
rub the lamp and a ghost appears. The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted

three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each"

So the eager senior manager shouted, "I want the first wish. I want to be
in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries." Pfufffff" and he Was
gone.

Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be In
Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails." Pfufffff" and
he Was also gone.

The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office after
lunch at 12.35pm."

*MORAL OF THE STORY IS: " ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSSES TO SPEAK FIRST"*

LESSON 2
Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document
which my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"

"Certainly," said the young executive.

He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the 'START'
button.

"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the
shredder machine. "I just need one copy."

*MORAL - NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS KNOWS EVERYTHING*

LESSON 3
An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA When
the American turned to the Japanese and asked, "What kind of -ese are you?"

The Japanese confused, replied, "Sorry but I don't understand what you
mean."

The American repeated, "What kind of -ese are you?" Again, the Japanese was
confused over he question.

The American, now irritated, then yelled, "What kind of -ese are you ...
Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese! etc......???"

The Japanese then replied, "Oh, I am a Japanese."
A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked, "What kind of
'key' was he".

The American, frustrated, yelled, "What do you mean what kind of -kee' am I?"

The Japanese said, "Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?"

*MORAL - NEVER INSULT ANYONE*
=========================================================
A witch went into a sweet shop to buy some sweets. the man behind the counter said "gosh you are really ugly aren't you? i've never seen anyone as offensively hideous as you." "young man" she replied, "i didn't come in here to be insulted." "really," he said " where do you usually go?"
==========================================================
Little johnny and his mother were on a train. johnny leant over and started to whisper in his mother ear. "johnny, how many times have i told you," said his mother, "it's rude to whisper. if you have something to say, say it out loud." "all right" said johnny, "why does the lady opposite look like an ugly, haggard old witch?"
============================================================
Two girls were having their packed lunch in the school playground. one had an apple and the other said, '' watch out for worms won't you!'' the first one replied "why should i? they can watch out for themselves."
==========================================================
My wife, a flight attendant for a major airline, watched one day as a passenger overloaded with bags tried to stuff his
belongings in the overhead bin of the plane. Finally, she informed him that he would have to check the oversized luggage.

"When I fly other airlines," he said irritably, "I don't have this problem."

My wife smiled, "When you fly other airlines, I don't have this problem either."

Ok going to countdown later for 2009... So fast a new year is coming...
Hope 2009 is better though...

2008-12-27T15:54:00.002+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Man comes home , finds his wife with his friend in bed . He shoots his friend and kills him.
Wife says "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends"

*******************************************

A small Boy wrote to Santa Claus," send me a brother"
Santa wrote back," SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"

****************************************

What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress

***********************************

Husband asks , "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??
Without Information Fighting Everytime
Wife replies," No, It means ,
With Idiot For Ever !!!"

*****************************************

What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,
Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant,
and Panic is when both are pregnant.

****************************************

Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?
Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack & our driver ran away.

*****************************************************

A women asks man who is traveling with six children, "Are all these kids yours??"

The man replies, " No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer complaints".

*****************************************************

A young boy asks his Dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential.

Dad says, "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, that's confidential!"

Well yesterday went to watch Ip Man quite nice though i rated it 8/10 then played bowling online with PS3 then watch TV and PSP till abt 2am then sleep ltr maybe going jogging with my primary sch fren...

2008-12-25T15:13:00.000+08:00

Everybody try this on MSN
按住alt然后按 22307 最后放开alt
按住alt然后按 35806 最后放开alt
按住alt然后按 24555 最后放开alt
按住alt然后按 20048 最后放开alt

Only works on MSN and MS words

2008-12-25T14:37:00.002+08:00

First of all Let me say Merry Christmas to all
Joke of the Day:
I dialed a number and got the following recording:

"I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes."

===========================================

At pilots training back in the Air Corps they taught us,
"Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the
number of take offs you make."

===========================================

Aspire to inspire before you expire.

============================================

My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine.

============================================

As my five year old son and I were headed to McDonald's one day, we
passed a car accident. Usually when we see something terrible like that,
we say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so I pointed and said to my
son, "We should pray."

From the back seat I heard his earnest request:
"Please, God, don't let those cars block the entrance to
McDonald's."

============================================
Well i Find this Funniest:
Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.

============================================
=============================================

God made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an
answer for her first question.

==============================================

I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting
harder to find one.

==============================================

Every morning is the dawn of a new error.

===============================================

Have a nice day!

Merry Christmas to all and a...happy new year! Well going countdown with Jia qi and Tian Ting and watching movie on that day.Just went basketball with my bro frens woke up at abt 8 thenplayed till 10am went to eat breakfast came home and bath then Blog ok bb i gonna go watch movie liao

2008-12-24T12:05:00.002+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Typing mistakes can be serious

1. A daughter sent a telegram to her father on passing her B.Ed exams, which the father received as "Father, your daughter has been successful in BED."

2. A husband, while on a business trip to a hill station sent a telegram to his wife "I wish you were here." The message received by the wife was "I wish you were her."

3. A man wanted to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he ordered a birthday cake. The salesman asked him what message he wanted put on the cake. He thought for a moment and said, "put getting older but you are getting better". The salesman asked "how do you want me to put it?" The man said ' Well...put "You are getting older" at the top and "but you are getting better" at the bottom. When the cake was unveiled at the party all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake. It read : "You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom"
_________________________________________________________________
Marketing Strategies:

Professor at the Management Institute was explaining marketing concepts:

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.

You go up to her and say, "I am very rich. Marry me!"

That's Direct Marketing.
-------------

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.

One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, "He's very rich. Marry him."

That's Advertising.
--------------

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say

"Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me."

That's Telemarketing.
--------------
You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink. You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say,

"By the way, I'm very rich. Will you marry me?"

That's Public Relations.
---------------
You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says,

> "You are very rich.." Will you marry me?

That's Brand Recognition.
--------------
You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I'm rich. Marry me" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.

That's Customer Feedback !!!!!
--------------
You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband

That's demand and supply gap.
--------------
You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say, "I am very rich. Marry me!" she turns her face towards you

she is your wife !

That's competition eating into your market share.

_________________________________________________________________

Yesterday went to my fren sch,Hai Xing Catholic Sec,He went to buy uniforms and i followed him then we went to his father shop after that we go back to my house and played PS3 till abt 9pm.

2008-12-21T09:46:00.003+08:00

Joke of the DAy:
"Thank you so much! You have done wonder to my body and look. I was an ugly
duckling before that and >now I looked like a princess."

When the gorgeous lady left the room, the surgeon's friend asked: "Wow, who
was that? You have certainly done a good job."

The surgeon replied: "Oh, that was my mum." and they carried on with
their conversation.

A moment later, another lady walked into his room. This lady was even more
gorgeous than the first one and she too came round and kissed the surgeon:
"Thank you so much! You have really made me look 20 years younger. Those
face lift and liposuction have certainly worked wonder to my look. How can I
ever thank you!"

As the lady left the room, his friend asked again: "Bloody hell. who was
that? she sure looks like a supermodel. I am really impressed with your
surgery skills now." The surgeon replied: "Oh, that was just my wife."

They then carried on with their normal conversation. Then suddenly a third
lady walked into the room. This lady has a perfect body and the look was so
beautiful it was beyond this world. She was even more gorgeous than the
first two ladies. She stormed towards the surgeon and gave him a big slap,
yelling: "You bastard. Look at what you have done to my body! You have
ruined my life!! I hope you will die in hell."

As the lady stormed away, the surgeon's friend turned round to him with a
puzzled look. The surgeon shook his head and responded: "Let's not talk
about it.....that was my father."
________________________________________________________________

A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly
dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of
dollars for dinner.

The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give
you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead?" "No, I had to
stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?"
the man asked. "No, I don't gamble," the homeless man said. "I need
everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Will you spend the on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?"
the man asked. "Are you NUTS!"
replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"

"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead
of food?" the man asked. "What disease would I get for ten lousy
bucks?!!" exclaimed the homeless man.

"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm
going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for
doing that?" I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

The man replied, "That's okay. I just want her to see what a man looks
like who's given up beer, gambling, golf, and sex.
________________________________________________________________

Let's Play - Who Wants To Be A Millionaire!

A husband and wife were getting ready for bed one evening.

"Honey," the fellow asked, "do you want to have make love tonight?"

"No dear, not tonight," she replied.

"Is that your final answer?"

"Yes, that is my final answer!"

"In that case," he said, "may I phone a friend?"
________________________________________________________________
1) Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his exam?
A: Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything.

2) The president of a large corporation opened his directors' meeting by announcing, "All those who are opposed to the plan I am about to propose will reply by saying, 'I resign'."

3) When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.

4) A little boy went up to his father and asked, "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?" His father replied, "Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, because I still have mine."

5) Sunny's teacher sent a note home to his mother saying, "Sunny seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about girls." The Mother wrote back the next day, "If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father."

Friday went swimming and came home played PS3.Then Yesterday went bowling with my family:

By the way anyone interested in going to bowling? I gt 2 free games..
I going to off my com soon cos need to play PS3 if not school reopen then no time liao

2008-12-17T12:31:00.010+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Wong Ah Fatt believed 8 was his lucky number. He was born on 8 Aug, lived at no. 8 Hoy Fatt Rd, and drove a car with 8888 on the no. plate. On his birthday 8 Aug 1988, he went to the Turf Club and was excited to see a horse named Fatt Fatt in race 8 drawn on barrier 8. He went to the 8th counter and placed a bet of $880 on Fatt Fatt. It came in 8th ________________________________________________________________ The young man went to see his boss and spoke up nervously. "Sir," he said, I would like to request your daughter's hand in marriage". "Eh? Hmm....... well, have you seen my wife?" said the boss. "Yes sir, I have sir, but I still prefer your daughter, sir!" ________________________________________________________________ Ladies hostel caught Fire.. it took 1 hour to bring the fire under control........ and another 3 hours to bring the firemen under control. ________________________________________________________________ Wife: If I sleep with your best friend what will be the first thought to come in your mind? Husband: that you are a lesbian.
________________________________________________________________ A divorced Couple were contesting for possession of the child.. The mother said: "I gave birth to him - he's mine" The father said: "I put a coin in the pepsi machine and a can comes out - the pepsi belongs to me! not to the machine !!" ________________________________________________________________ A girl says to her boyfriend, "One kiss and I'll be yours forever." The guy says 'thanks for the warning' ________________________________________________________________ A Husband Was Asked: "Do you talk to your wife after sex?" He replied: "Depends, If I Can find a Phone" ________________________________________________________________ Man to wife on wedding night-"Are you sure I'm the first man you are sleeping with?' "Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the others!'

Went to Watched Twilight with Jia le on Monday and bought clothes.
Yesterday I went to Singapore Indoor Stadium for Friendly Basketball Match With Singapore Slingers Vs Australia Here is The Pics:

Cheerleaders at first quarter:

Free Throw at First Quarter:

Score at the end of first quarter:
25-30

Cheerleader at 2nd Quarter:

Score at the end of 2nd Quarter:
37-35

Bear at 3rd Quarter:

Score at the end of 3rd Quarter:
I tink is 60-56

Cheerleaders at 4th Quarter:

Final Score:
91-66 Singapore Wins

Ok no more....

2008-12-15T12:43:00.003+08:00

Ok Here is your long-waited Joke of the Day:
Two men were out playing golf on a nice Saturday afternoon. They were getting frustrated, though, because the two women who were playing right in front of them were quite slow, and were holding up the men's game.
"Don't they know they're supposed to let us play through?" asked the first man. The other man shook his head. "I'm going to go ask them if we can play through," said the first man, emphatically, "Enough is enough."
He started walking over toward the women, but as he got close, he suddenly turned around and came back, white as a ghost.
"Oh God," he said to his friend, "This is awful. You're going to have to ask those women if we can play through. You see, one of them is my wife, and the other is my mistress."
The other man shrugged, and said "No sweat." He walked over toward the women, and just as he was getting close, turned around and came running back to his pal. His eyes wide open, he said, "Small world!"
------------------------------------------------
An American, a Chinese and a Singaporean were in a terrible car accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room, but all three of them died before they arrived. Just as they were about to put the toe tag on the American, he stirred and opened his eyes. Astonished, the doctors and nurses present asked him what happened.

"Well," said the American, "I remember the crash, and then there was a beautiful light, and then the Chinese, Singaporean and I were standing at the gates of heaven. St. Peter approached us and said that we were all too young to die, and that for a donation of $100, we could return to the earth."

He continued, " So of course, I pulled out my wallet and gave him the $100, and the next thing I knew I was back here."

"That's amazing!" said one of the doctors, "But what happened to the other two?"

"Last I saw them," replied the American, "the Chinese was haggling over the price and the Singaporean was waiting for the government to pay for his." (Medisave)
-----------------------------------------------------
A man was leaving a cafe when he noticed an unusual funeral. A funeral
coffin was followed by a second one. Behind the second coffin was a
solitary man walking with a black dog.

Behind him was a queue of 200 men walking in single line.

The man couldn't stand his curiosity.

He approached the man walking with the dog, "I am so sorry to disturb
you, but I've never seen a funeral like this with so many of you
walking in single line.

"Whose funeral is it?"

The man replied, "That first coffin is for my wife."

What happened to her?"

"My dog attacked and killed her."
Well, who is in the second coffin? "

"My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog
attacked and killed her also."

A thoughtful moment of silence passes between the two men.

Then the first one asks in excitement, "Can I borrow the dog?"

The man replied,

"Join the queue."!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
--------------------------------------
A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."

In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.

The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.

"The bus driver insulted me," she fumed.

The man sympathized and said, "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers."

You're right," She said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind."

"That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey."

Going to Vivo with Jia le todae for clothes and have not been updating cos nothing to do with my com.....

2008-12-09T11:48:00.003+08:00

Joke of the Day:
A woman goes to Italy to attend a 2-week, company training session.

Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.

The wife answers :Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?

The husband laughs and says:An Italian girl !!! The woman kept quiet and left.

Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks:So, honey, how was the trip?

Very good, thank you.And, what happened to my present?

Which present? She asked.

The one I asked for - an Italian girl!!

Oh, that� she said Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait for nine months to see if it is a girl !!!
LOL...

I have not been posting cos i have been playing my PS3 and when i wanted to post my bro frens came and we played till 4am then slept so in the end nver post liao.

2008-11-29T20:39:00.003+08:00

Joke of the Day:

Broken finger

One day, a lady went to visit a doctor.

Lady : Doctor, Everytime i touch any part of my body, I feel pain.

Following that, she poke her elbow. She screamed. She then poked her forehead, she screamed even louder. It was the same when she poke her feet, her arm and anywhere else. Each time she touch herself, she scream even louder than before.

Lady : SO doctor, what am I suffering from ? is it fatal ? Am I going to die ?

Doctor : No, its not fatal. But you have a broken finger.

Number story

Ah Lum was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 & 10.
Not only did he do it from 1 to 10, he also did it from 10 back to 1 as well. This is his story.

1 day I went 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep but the couple saw me so I panicked and 4 down. The man rushed out and wanted to 5 with me. I ran until I fell 6 and threw up. So I went into 7eleven and grabbed some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and tried to stab him. 10 god he ran away.

So I put the 9 back and paid for the 8 and then I left 7eleven. Next day, I called my boss and said that I was 6. He said, "5, tomorrow also no neeed to come back 4 work." He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand. I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1

What My Mother Taught Me

1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION...
"Just wait until your father gets home."

2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING....
"You are going to get it when we get home!"

3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE...
"What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you ... Don't talk back to me!"

4. My Mother taught me LOGIC...
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, your not going to the store with me."

5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE...
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD...
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

7. My Mother taught me ESP...
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

8. My Mother taught me HUMOR...
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

9. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT...
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

10. My Mother taught me about SEX....
"How do you think you got here?"

11. My Mother taught me about GENETICS...
"You're just like your father."

12. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS...
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"

13. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE...
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."

14. And my all time favourite... JUSTICE...
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you...

then you'll see what it's like."

Went to Giant todae and bought my bicycle and many other things.It will be delivered tmr and for those who dun noe I tink there will be a class chalet on 10 Dec to 11 Dec..

2008-11-27T16:43:00.004+08:00

Joke of the Day:
How Italians do business
Luigi (father): ‘I want you to marry a girl of my choice.’

Son: ‘I will choose my own bride.’

Luigi: ‘But the girl is Bill Gates’ daughter.’

Son: ‘Well, in that case . . . ok’

Next Luigi approaches Bill Gates.

Luigi: ‘I have a husband for your daughter.’

Bill Gates: ‘But my daughter is too young to marry.’

Luigi: ‘But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank’.

Bill Gates: ‘Ah, in that case . . ok’

Finally Luigi goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Luigi: ‘I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president.’

President: ‘But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!’

Luigi : ‘But this young man is Bill Gates’ son-in-law.’

President: ‘Ah, in that case . . ok’

Went to buy Sec 3 Books todae.And took taxi home and i found out that the taxi has a small touch screen TV and it shows info abt movies,shopping and others things i was playing with it till i reach home.

2008-11-24T15:44:00.003+08:00

Joke of the Day:
John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, Their 11 year old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late.

'Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?' asked John.

'Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project,' said Tommy.

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, Knocking him completely out of his chair.

'Son,' said John, 'this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school.'

'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy.

'What did you watch?' asked Marsha.

'The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy.

The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, Knocking him off his chair once more.

With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, Sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.'

'I am ashamed of you son,' said John. 'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.'

The robot then walked around to John And delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, 'Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!'

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

Just watched a movie called Downfall. It is a German movie and it is abt the last few days of Hitler life in Berlin.It is one of the few best war movies and Hitler actually lost his mind before he commit suicide...

2008-11-19T22:51:00.004+08:00

Joke of the Day:
The prince and the curse

Once upon a time there was a prince who, through no fault of his own, was cast under a spell by an evil witch. The curse was that the Prince could speak only one word each year. However, he could save up the words so that if he did not speak for a whole year, the following year he was allowed to speak two words.

One day he met a beautiful princess (ruby lips, golden hair, sapphire eyes,) and fell madly in love. With the greatest difficulty he decided to refrain from speaking for two whole years so that he could look at her and say "my darling". But at the end of the two years he wished to tell her that he loved her. Because of this he waited three more years without speaking (bringing the total number of silent years to 5).

But at the end of these five years he realized that he had to ask her to marry him. So he waited ANOTHER four years without speaking.

Finally as the ninth year of silence ended, his joy knew no bounds. Leading the lovely princess to the most secluded and romantic place in that beautiful royal garden the prince heaped a hundred red roses on her lap, knelt before her, and taking her hand in his, said huskily, "My darling, I love you! Will you marry me?"

The princess tucked a strand of golden hair behind a dainty ear, opened her sapphire eyes in wonder, and parting her ruby lips, said:

"What you say again?Can you repeat it?"
The Prince fainted..

Hey Everyone i want to help me with this game called The Wicked u can play it here:
http://thewickedquiz.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2
Try it. it looks easy the beginning but harder in the end.I am stuck at level 8.Level 7 is very hard feel free to ask me for hints.

Jia le came my house yesterday for PSP game (wat a noob dun have psp game) Then he went home at abt 7pm.Played my PS3 till abt 11am then watch TV...

2008-11-16T15:18:00.003+08:00

Ok Sorry for not posting jokes for so long cos playing PS3 the whole week...
Joke of the Day:
WOMEN'S REVENGE

'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.

'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'

WORDS

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...

30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...

The husband then turned to his wife and asked,

'What?'

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.

Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 AM .'

He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'

Just went to changi Airport to see my bro off to india for his army training.I did not sleep for the whole day yesterday as my bro frens came to see him off too and we played PS3 for the whole Day with my newly bought Game NBA Live 09 till abt 4am then we went down to wait for Taxi then
we went off for Changi Airport and then we found out we got there too early and we went for Breakfast there abt 5.30am and got home at abt 7am Then slept until abt 1pm....

2008-11-09T22:18:00.003+08:00

Joke of the Day:
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".
LOL...

Er Happy Bdae Kendra! Hope ur life is better next year as u are same class wif me next year. I went to make a new specs on sat at kovan and choose for very long until the shopkeeper recommended me one.

2008-11-06T07:28:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
During the first day of college, the Principal was informing the boys about the rules that they must observe.

He said, "We have very strict rules about boys hanging around girls' dorm rooms. If someone is caught doing that, the fine would be $100. Second such offense would be $200, and third one will cost you $500."

A guy from the back shouted, "How much for a season pass?"
LOL.......
Fell Sick recently so no energy to blog and post jokes....So gt nothing to say....

2008-11-03T11:00:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Stupid Drivers
Two rich men were talking over coffee one day and one of them said to the other one "Hey I tell you my driver is really stupid... you don't believe?

Let me show you." and he called his driver Ah Beng over and said "Ah Beng, here is a 10 dollar note, go to the car showroom and buy me a Mercedes." to which Ah Beng replied, "Yes Sir! right away!" and rushed off to the showroom.

The rich man turned to his friend and said, "See, I told you he was stupid." The other rich man said, "That's nothing, you want to see stupid, I will show you stupid." and he called his driver, Ali. "Ali, go home now and check to see if I'm at home." to which Ali said, "Yes Sir, right away Sir." and ran home. "See what I told you? He doesn't even have enough brains to know that I cannot be at home if I am here."

Later on, the two drivers met on the road. Ah Beng said to Ali, "Eh, you know my boss is sooo stupid. He gave me 10 dollars and ask me to go to the car showroom and buy him a Mercedes..... Doesn't he know that today is Sunday lah, the showroom is closed!"
Ali replied, "You think he is stupid ah? My boss lagi worse, he asked me to go home to check if he is at home.... He got hand phone what, can just call up to check lah!!!!"

Nth to wite today jus gt a job for tmr so there is nothing interesting today.

2008-11-02T12:52:00.000+08:00

Ok i am trying this game called Word linkage.Here is the
Rules.

Rules:

Just post words linking to the word in the previous post. Various formats for posting are allowed. You can either just post, from the previous post, or do a linkage, i.e. "star - hub".
Do try to keep it to one post per member at a time. No continuous spamming allowed.
Short phrases are allowed when the situation calls for it (i.e. Proctor & Gamble), but do be nice and keep it to one word phrases whenever possible.
Post ur word on the tagboard.
Eg.Bus then next person can write Stop on the tagboard and this forms Bus-Stop Do support me Thks!

Ok i will start first
White...

2008-11-02T12:20:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Morris, the Governor's most trusted assistant, died in his sleep one night. The Governor had depended on Morris for advice on every subject, from pending bills to wardrobe decisions. In addition, Morris had been his closest friend.

So, it was understandable that the Governor didn't take kindly to the droves of ambitious office seekers who wanted Morris' job. "They don't even have the decency to wait until the man is buried," the Governor muttered.

At the funeral, one eager beaver made his way to the Governor's side. "Governor," the man said, "is there a chance that I could take Morris' place?"

"Certainly," the governor replied. "But you'd better hurry. I think the undertaker is almost finished."

Nth Special happened todae Just received a msg that i may get a job to distribute flyers in a carpark and $20/1000pcs and i am actually quite happy as i have nth to do the whole week only if ppl ask me out.Wanted to buy a new PS3 game or The Dark Knight Blu-Ray disc still thinking...May ask jia le to go out with me in search of new games...

2008-11-01T13:07:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Ways to Turn Men Down Must learn for girls....

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized!"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I can tell that you want me."
Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you...to leave."

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy."
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

Man: "May I see you pretty soon?"
Woman: "Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?"

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"

HIM: Can I buy you a drink?
HER: Actually I'd rather have the money.

HIM: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours .
HER: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

HIM: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
HER: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HIM: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
HER: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HIM: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
HER: Okay, get out.

HIM: I think I could make you very happy.
HER: Why? Are you leaving?

HIM: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
HER: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HIM: Can I have your name?
HER: Why? Don't you already have one?

HIM: Shall we go see a movie?
SHE: I've already seen it.

HIM: Where have you been all my life?
HER: Hiding from you.

Went out with class to watch The Coffin movie actually the movie quite good and this is the first i watched ghost movie in a cinema i dun waste money to scare myself...We met at abt 1pm then went to vivocity and meet wei cong and zong yu.Then wee seng came to meet us.at abt 4.50 we went in the cinema then found out we actually bought one extra ticket....And i paid for it...I sat in the middle of jia le and Carrie then after abt half the movie then went to sit wif Jolyn and they like very scared...The girls very funny lo watch ghost movie dun watch the ghost among them all Madeline is the bravest i mus say and shu fen cried a few times..

2008-10-31T12:07:00.000+08:00

Joke Of The Day:
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
____________________________________

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
____________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
__________________________________

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_______________________________________

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
_________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
___________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
Haha...

Jus came bk from PCBunk with Jia Qi, Tian Ting and Zhi Sheng. We went to played pcbink from 11 to abt 5.30 and it is onli $12 . Go there if u are free. Then we went to HarbourFront MRT to sell my PS3 Games YAY finally sold..The buyer is from Singapore Air Force and abt in his 30s.Then we went to Compass POint to eat dinner and then we loiter around TimeZone till abt 8 and we went home....

2008-10-30T04:41:00.000+08:00

OK here is the Joke of the DAy:
Ah Beng Jokes:
Why did Ah Beng go to a movie with his 18 friends?

Because below 18 not allowed !

Ah Beng is filling up an application form for a job.
He supplied the information for the columns on Name, Age, Address etc.
Then he comes to column on "Salary Expected", but he is not sure of the question.
After much thought, he writes " Yes "

After taking photocopies of documents, Ah Beng always compares it with
the original for spelling mistakes.

Ah Beng always smiles during lightning storms because he thinks his picture is being taken.

Why can't Ah Beng dial 911?
Because he can't find the number 11 (eleven) on the phone.

Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it.
When he encountered some problems. He decide to use the 'Help' command after some tries.
Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer retailer
for support.
Ah Beng : "I press the 'F1' key for help lah, but it's been over half an hour and still nobody come and help me ?!"

Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor.
The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring - but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear"
"Oh dear !" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ... what happened to the other ear ?"
Ah Beng answered : "That stupid dumbo called back!!!!"

Ah Beng talk to a long-distance telephone operator.
Ah Beng: "COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME THE TIME DIFFERENCE BETWEEN Taipei AND LAS VEGAS ?"
Operator: "JUST A MINUTE..."
Ah Beng : "THANK YOU " AND PUTS DOWN THE PHONE.

After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for quite some time, Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend.
"It took me ONLY 5 MONTHS TO DO IT", Ah Beng brags.
"FIVE MONTHS ? THAT'S TOO LONG", the friend exclaims.
"YOU ARE A FOOL." Ah Beng replies, "SEE THIS BOX, IT IS WRITTEN FOR 4-7 YRS"

At a bar in New York, the man to Ah Beng's left tells the bartender,
"JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE" and his companion says, "JACK DANIELS, SINGLE".
The bartender approaches Ah Beng and asks, "AND YOU, SIR ?"
Ah Beng replies : "Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED"

Nothing special happened todae woke up at 10. Used com to blog and browse forums to search for interesting things and i found this thread that says post all ridiculous things school incidents and i saw one and i found it funny. It says that when he is in sec 1 mid-year, there is Some sec2 or 3 went to dress up as a terrorist, take a fake AK-47 went in front of the police station and started 'shooting'. Police gave chase.Next day DM ask them to do re-enactment in the morning assembly. They power sia...

2008-10-29T13:30:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
A man was just recovering in hospital after being unconscious for a week. His wife was sitting by his side when he woke up.

Man: Honey, you've been by my side when I was in that car crash, you were there when I lost my job, you were present when my parents died, and you were by my side when someone stole all my money from my account.....and you know what?

Wife: What?

Man: I think you're bad luck.
LOL...

Went to tampines with Jia Le at abt 12 and He wanted to buy games but to no avail.We went to Kovan after that and he download the games to his PSP there..At 4 we went to Jia Le house and played com and Xbox till 6. We went to play bball wif Jia Le frens and they are very interesting and fun.They prank Shu Fen when she ask jia le if he wanted to go watch High School Musical 3 and they prank her by saying that if she wanted to stead with Jia Le..They were damn Funny...and of cos jia le told her that it is his frens.We played bball with some 16-18 years old guys and we won luckily(11-9) It was a great match...Then we went home and reached home at abt 9...

2008-10-28T08:07:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
11 people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, 10 men & 1 woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave, because otherwise they were all going to fall. They were unable to decide who would let go, until the woman gave a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because, as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids and for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping.
HAHA..

Woke up at 8 todae And went jogging with my Brother and Sisters.Came back at 9.30 ate Breakfast and used computer.Still trying to sell my PS3 games...Sophia(The baby my mother have been taking care of) came at 10.Here is a picture of her :.

My Bro friends and my cousins came at 2 and my bro friends played PS3 till 3 and went for pool. My cousins came and do their homework till 4 and played computer. This is a picture of them:

James And Joseph

26 October 2008

2008-10-26T18:22:00.000+08:00

Joke of the Day:
Ok this is quite long...
BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...
GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??
BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??
SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.
MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick.
WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".
2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".

3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
Pupil : "A teacher".
4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other colors do you have?"
5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.
6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".
7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated".
8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".
9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".
10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died".
11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."
12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."

Woke up at 10am todae nth special happened.Watched Tv till 3 and used computer till now.
Trying to sell my PS3 Games online and earn money to buy birthday presents...
Going to 3EB next year and Sad to leave 2EC .Hope 3EB will be a good class...